Dear John letters

From USAFA Folklore

It is an unavoidable, totally predictable eventuality that a cadet will be dumped by their high-school squeeze. This usually happens before their Fourth-Class Christmas break, and is manifested in the (heart-rending to the recipient, and knee-slappingly hilarious to the rest of the Wing) "Dear John" letter. (Such letters invariably contained some variation on the phrase "We can still be friends.") Cadets have been known to post "Dear John"/"Dear Jane" letters outside their rooms or on a squadron bulletin board. Other cadets on their way to and from class would make spelling and grammar corrections and add comments. The recently-dumped cadink, or another squadron member, would then mail the marked-up letter back to his/her ex.

[edit] Accounts

• I was told in the early 80's that a guy at one of the prep schools did the standard Dear John reply, with about three pages of added "you're a slut/bitch/whore" comments from his buds. She retaliated by sending him a photo of her and her new boyfriend, with his schlong in her hand. I guess she thought that was a pretty good slam, until they took the photo and mailed it to her mother. (9 Oct 2000)